Goodbye

Life is hard.

Decisions and distance are hard, too.

Life is short.

I will not live in regret.

I will never forget how I love you even as we say goodbye.

I made my choice and I stand by it.

Goodbye.

Missed Connection

After a roughly 6-hr flight from JFK to London Heathrow I grabbed my bags and ran off the plane. I literally ran trying to catch my flight to Istanbul. I should have had an hour layover but since the original flight was delayed 20 minutes I was fucked. I am soo pissed about it but what can I do?! Nothing. Well, nothing but sit. The timing is awful, as well. Why aren't people up at 6:26 am in NY, hmm?? The bittersweet anxiety is drawn out even longer now. I miss Pinar Demir...

Valentine's 2010

Here's a special Valentine's post for ya.

First, a shout out: Sema <3 take a look @ this pic! It seemed like something you would be interested in seeing. It's from postsecret.com, which posts new anonymous postcards sent in every Sunday. I love the site and check it every week!

Second, my theory about Turkish male-female relationships. The men are capable of being such pigs that the women must behave as cold bitches just to stop their disgusting savageness. Then they sit around complaining and justifying their behavior by blaming the women's frigidness.

FUCK this cycle. Damn it to Valentine's Hell!

This is Hrithik Roshan and he is hot. Hot!

Tamam mı? Tamam.

He's a Bollywood star that is seriously handsome. I really like his alluring skin, beautiful eyes, and dark hair. I have really started to appreciate this kind of man lately. I used to only like light features, like red or blond hair but darker is damn sexy. It definitely my time in Turkey taking its toll, but I don't mind it =P

However, the best part about Hrithik is his uniqueness and confidence. Took a close look at the top picture again. If you concentrate on the lower left side corner you will see that he has 2 thumbs. He could remove the extra one but he doesn't. It's like he accepts himself just the way God created him and I think that's the hottest thing possible.

Rollerblading dream

I had a weird ass dream last night.

I was rollerblading around a huge urban city. At first I was falling all over the place. But then, later on, I was officially good. Also, there was this kid that would skate with me. I don't remember what he looked like exactly. He was tall and had long hair. I get the feeling he was foreign, too. We had each other's backs. We skated the city blocks together but we skated at different paces. He was so much quicker than I was especially when I was stunt skating and DOIN' FLIPS N' SHIT. Still he waited at the end of each block. We were having so much fun that we decided to continue exploring and skating rather than going back to the dorm. I followed him into a building and up a set of stairs that I found out led to a dock and when I got to the top he was gone.

I looked for him and waited but he was completely GONE!

What the hell does this mean?

Winter Lavender

Let me start with a few points: first, I know I keep talking about nail polish; second, I know it's not the most fascinating thing; and third, I know I said I was looking for a green. I bought a dark - nearly black - green and wore it for a day but it was a flop. Despite all of this, I want to show you my newest nail color. I bought it yesterday and love wearing it thus far. It's the most interesting crosses between brown and purple...in fact, I would even venture as far as saying it's BURPLE!! When it's beside brown it picks up the palette and everybody claims it's brown but when it's besides purple and green it looks like a dull lavender. When left to my own accord I stick with earth tones and natural hues in my wardrobe so these nails let me mix in the flowery, girly colors (which I have been searching through without feeling out of comfort range which is one the main reasons I change colors as often as I do). It's beautiful and dull. Actually, it's beautiful in its dullness and I would definitely name it "Winter Lavender". I'm going to look for more colors in the palette, too. Maybe the "Winter Tulip" or "Winter Daffodil" is waiting out there. Ya think?

Btw, the polish is OPI Over the Taupe.

"The Great Scout and Cathouse Thursday"

I once took a film class about Western films called "Cowboys and Calamity Jane." When I was flipping through the channels at home today I came across the movie "The Great Scout and Cathouse Thursday." It's fantastically simple satire. Check it out...especially if you're a "Blazing Saddle" fan!

Green please

I found the image above from a google search on "green nail polish" because I have been dying to find the perfect shade of green for my nails. I tried and failed once already, but still I vow to trudge on looking all over God's green Earth in pursuit of the perfect shade of green. I just painted my nails green yesterday morning actually (see photo). However, I wanted to switch after only a few hours FML. The perfect shimmer-less olive-dark green color is out there (kinda like "Polished Princess" by Barielle on the far right side) and I'm going to find that son-of-a-bitch.

My license arrived biatch

I turned 21 in a sleeper cab of the Oriental Express traveling from Bucharest, Romania back to Istanbul, Turkey during the 2nd Bayram of Fall '09. I love being able to say that; it just sounds so damn amazing. In America your 21stBirthday is the most important birthday by far. I mean we have the ridiculously high drinking age of 21 unlike the rest of the world. At first I was bummed about missing my big day by spending it in Turkey because I was missing home terribly. All-in-all, my 21st was awesome but let's keep on topic with this post....

When I came back from Turkey I had to go to the DMV to renew my license, which cost a whopping $80 because the fees increased just in time for my birthday. So last Monday my Mother paid out the ass for me and I took another picture. They gave me an interim license so I could drive and since that did not have a photo I have been using my passport to go to the bars. I have great news!! The lady said it would take 2-3 weeks to receive my unrestricted license in the mail but I opened it up today. Hell yaa biatches!

Beginning?

The name is Sydney. I am a Puerto Rican-American studying and living the best I can in an incredible, beautiful world. However, if you are finding yourself on this page I hope this isn't news to you. But still I don't know where to begin my blogging?? I don't think I can write my thoughts directly onto paper (or more appropriately the computer screen) because I'm reluctant to be that open of a person. So, at the very best it can take a while to translate them satisfactorily and until then I am going to try...